Well, today was my day off.
I started to think, “what did I accomplish?”
Not much really.
I ran to Home Depot with my wife to pick up a couple things for a display I am helping her make, and I made some cookies for her to take when she goes to visit her mother later this week… the rest are for us.
My garage is a mess, my “man cave” is nearly as bad.
I cleaned nothing today. I cured no one, as far as I know I didn’t make any impact on the world for good or ill.
I started to feel like crap for this.
Then I thought, why? Why do I feel like this for just mellowing out? For not having an agenda and a to do list, for not meeting goals?
I mean, did God not rest on the 7th day after all the creating stuff was done? Is not a Sabbath a built in need for us as human? Were we not made to rest as well as to work? So then why do I find goofing off so blasted bothersome… notice I didn’t say I couldn’t do it. I manage to goof off pretty well… but resting and feeling good about it.. well that… that I have a harder time with that.
Maybe it is the good mid-western work ethic I hear that I have, maybe it is the guilt and piety of my Scandiavian and Germanic ansesstors and the whole waist not idea, maybe it is sin, the forces of darkness niggling away at me trying to convince me that somehow someway I must always do more to be sucessful, to be loved, to be worthy…
I am not sure… but I will try to be at peace for yet another week with a messy garage and a man cave littered with wires and guitar parts.
Blessings to you as you seek to rest in who God created you to be.